If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
