I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Actions speak louder than pants.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
