oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
