Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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