So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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