It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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