no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
