I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
