I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I stole a fireplace last night.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
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