I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
