Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
