it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
