That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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