I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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