she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
