Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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