i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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