Just mADE A PArabola og urine
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
So much rum. So many feels.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
