Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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