Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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