idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
