it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
