im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
