..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
where does the pee come out of this thing
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
