Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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