I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
