How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
