Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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