IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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