i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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