Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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