She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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