i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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