i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
