Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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