She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
