the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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