Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
