like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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