What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
