she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
