i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
