Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
