i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Randomize
