watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I want to fling myself into the sun
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
