Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm like, not good at living.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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