I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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