just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
