I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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