i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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